I like to tease them they want to touch me I never let them

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A man approached the bar, staggering slightly. She pretended she didn’t notice him for as long as she could possibly justify, then looked up from her wiping. Hihowsitgoingwhatareyouafter? She asked. How about your phone number? Suzon grimaced but managed not to roll her eyes. Geez love, take a joke. Two pints of IPA, and pour them properly, I’m not paying for half a pint of bloody head. She poured the pints and brought them to him. Good job sweetheart he said, putting his money down on the bar, right into a puddle of beer he’d just spilled.

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I know what boys like I know what guys want

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Jeanne had told her today that Édouard, one of the local barflies, had contracted syphillus. Well that’s just karma for his terrible tips Suzon had joked. Too far! Jeanne had screeched, swatting her, and then laughing soundlessly with her mouth so wide open Suzon could see her fillings. Suzon didn’t actively want Édouard to die, she just didn’t care if it happened; he was a handsy drunk and she wouldn’t mind not having to serve him anymore. Even though he would just be replaced with a different handsy drunk, in theory.

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